The Yellow Pencil

(Published in Poesy, 1st Intl. Issue, 10.06 )

The yellow pencil
was special
purchased twenty years ago
at art school
now worn down
to a stub of itself;
a log of memories
was etched into its thinness

It symbolized Time frozen
in the fullness
of youthfulness
and the freshness
of independence

It recorded the beginning
of my artistic history
of self discovery;
was the leaden key
to the door to creativity

It released the clutch
of the journey of meaning -
a surrender of self
to the god of art

For twenty years
it was always with me,
a pencil for pleasure
and artistic emergencies
was the pilot
into the uncharted blankness
of my canvas

It left one day nonchalantly
in the pocket of a student
who never returned it,
and I still reach for it
with the habitual certainty
of twenty years’ memory
that this precious yellow pencil
is still with me

© 2.2004 Helen Bar-Lev